*image by Ben Harubin

As he stood, surveying all of his back yard, a man thought, "Flowers do not
'know themselves,' and bees do not 'know themselves,' yet they bloom, they
fly, they fully live their lives; what is it with man that causes him to believe
that there is some sort of real importance to him 'knowing himself'?"
“And perhaps even 'curiouser' than that, just what the hell does he believe
that to actually mean?”

First man says, "I guess it could really be a struggle to ever recognize
just how stupid you are?"
To which a second man replies, "But something ever harder is to stop being
stupid once you realize it."
And after thinking about this for a bit, the first man says, "That doesn't
make any sense at all."
And the second man says, "I know."

Perceived only by the post-stupid is the fact that once you begin to think
(and hence become stupid) it is truly difficult after that to just up and stop.

"I may be riding a disreputable ass, but it's my ass! ...It's mine, I tell
you! It's mine!"

(Yeah, yeah, that's what they all think.)

First would-be mystic says, "I guess it's really an unimaginable struggle to
ever fully realize just how asleep you are."
To which one more experienced in the matter replies, "But something even
more fantastic is how hard it is to stop sleeping even after you've become
plainly aware of the condition."
And the novice, after pondering this for a moment, says, "But that makes no
sense whatsoever."
And the mystic just nods his agreement.

(I thought perhaps some of you might enjoy this slightly verbally different
version of the earlier story. Some "would-be'rs" prefer such terms as
being "asleep" to simply being "stupid." I can understand that, and can
respect-- no strike "respect," I went too far, I'm lying now. We'll just
leave it at "I can understand that." (Not that I like it -- nor should you.)

A man who takes no prisoners, has no prisoners.

For a while one man held the private position that "there is nothing worth
thinking about," which he later revised to "if there is anything worth
thinking about, I'm not thinking about it!"

A man called a mystic on the phone and said, "I have always wanted to talk to you."
And after the mystic said nothing in return, the man asked, "Did you hear me?"
And the mystic bluntly replied, "Yes, I was waiting for you to say whatever it was
that you called me to say."
And the man (momentarily flustered) finally blurted out, "Well...I guess I mainly
called just to tell you that you are my hero."
And that being that, the mystic hung up.

The reason that mystics so seldom avail themselves of phones and other
communications equipment and technology is that they generally know how to
contact themselves directly.
...And having finally awakened, the mystic hung up -- once and for all.