*image by Ben Harubin

In his skull, where everyone else has their brain and consciousness,
one man had a little cage with a rat in it -- served the same purpose,
he discovered.

And shortly after this story was read, The Lovers Of Caged Rats Society
wrote in to complain, but -- screw 'em!

A man had a radio that picked up no stations he liked -- he tried to turn it off,
but couldn't -- he couldn't believe that he couldn't turn it off,
yet continued to find that he couldn't.
What to do?
What to do?
What to do?

One man kept accidentally shooting himself,
but it only bothered him if he looked at the wound.

One man kept accidentally shooting himself,
but couldn't tell for sure if it was really accidental or not.

One man kept accidentally shooting himself,
and decided to finally rectify the problem,
but after extensive experimentation was surprised to find himself
in the perplexing position of not being sure if he should approach it from the bullet's side
or from his body's view of it.

One man narrowed down all of his studies into a single question:
What is it that connects all things but circumstances -- and just who the hell
came up with the idea anyway?