A son asked a father: “If it were true that no one knows where life is headed,
and thus anything they say on the matter is meaningless,
what would be the benefit of them being aware of it?”
    “Your ponders are improving.”
 
 

In an attempt (as he puts it): “To get the jump on things before they jump on him” --  one man would periodically stop what he is doing  --  turn  --  look at himself  --
and say: “Who died and put me in charge?”
 
 

Damned Old Fact Number Seven.
Every monumental discovery eventually becomes mush.
 
 

Dialogue Number Eighty One.
“The question is: was he a savior, or a plunderer?”
      “You’re speaking of that virus that got in my mind?!”
 
 

“The most efficient way to fame,” said the P. R. advisor,
“Is to the add the word, ‘Legendary’ before your name.”
     “I did that and it didn’t work,” responded the client,
     “People kept asking me what I was legendary for!”
“Jesus! --   what kind of low life audience were you courting!”
 
 

Confusing the words, “drive and drivel” (concerning what it takes to get-ahead-in-life) has (says one man) caused untold troubles IN his life.
(And another guy says: “I know some places he could move to
where such an oversight would be irrelevant.”)
 
 

“The great thing about being an archeologist” (says one) “Is that you can
focus almost exclusively on the past and be held in esteem for doing so.”
(“Shit!” says another man, “I know lots of places where you can get by doing that.” )
 
 

One guy’s favorite proverb is: “Many are called, but few will accept the charges,”
(and one soaring eagle wondered if turkeys had any idea of what they are missing --  then suddenly realized: “Certainly they don’t;
its obvious just by looking at them that they have never even thought about it  --
now THERE is your saving grace  --   to EVERYTHING!”               [some bird, huh?!])
 
 

Said a father to a son: “Everyone’s body has a life of its own,
a reality men only think about when the body is ill;
everyone’s mind also has a life of its own, a fact that no one actually faces,
but will pretend to when their thoughts are temporarily giving them a bad time.
What can you get out of this my boy?!  --  now there’s a good-day question for you.”
 
 

One man pretends that his life is just a movie he is in,
and when things begin to go badly he simply yells: “Cut!”
(Plus he says he got his own trailer in the deal.)
And another guy pretends his life is a recording session, so that if he
starts to feel down he can say to his imaginary engineer: “Boost the highs.”
And yet a third man largely acts as though his personal life doesn’t exist
(or at least that he is mostly oblivious to it),
and a bystander injects: “Hell, I know that last fellow!” –
(don’t we all, sir  --  don’t we all).
 
 

The speaker proclaimed: “When your emotional temperament starts to lose its tenor, your mind begins a terrifying downhill slide,” and from the crowd someone shouted: “How can you avoid it?”   “Don’t age,” he replied, and the man who had asked
was left to consider exactly what was meant by the response.
 
 

Upon hearing the perfect woman described as a deaf and dumb nympho
who owns a liquor store, one man mused: “Metaphorically speaking,
those are the same attributes that would mark the info needed for life to make sense.”
(He later admitted this was a metaphoric stretch, “But then again,” he added,
“What are metaphors for?!”)
 
 
 

The local adjudicator of such matters said in his published opinion:
“We are dealing both with incentive and punishment, neither of which works,
but without them  --   nothing gets done.”
 
 
 

Whenever there is a power vacuum in your mind --  words will quickly rush in to fill it;
there is never a real threat of anarchy in the heads of the normal, (you see):
that is the prime feature of being normal:
no possibility of regime change in your neural seat of power.
(Only those genetically wired for rebellion can rebel.)
 
 
 

The more urgently does a man present his view on a matter,
the less he understands the matter;
a man who knows what is going on in life  --  by force of his understanding  --
has no views to push;
he recognizes and understands entertaining nonsense.
 
 
 

Dialogue Number Eighty Eight.
“You think it’s easy!”
       “Easy has nothing to do with it --  you just do it or you don’t.”
“You do realize that telling me this just makes it harder  --  okay: less easy.”
 
 

One man declined most social invitations with the explanation that he was too involved with, babysitting himself.       (FYI: he would say this sans any trace of irony or sarcasm.)
 
 

One man’s unpublished business card reads:
“My specialty  --  unspeakable;  its rewards  --  unbelievable.”
(He guards these vigorously.....handing them out only to himself.....
.....when he is momentarily in a down mood.)
 
 

News About The Hearth.
A man’s primary residence is his body;
his vacation home is his mind;
ordinary men make the appropriate use of each,
the man on the secret move develops a second image of himself
which abides no place identifiable;
ergo can the certain man say to his original mind:
“Don’t bother trying to contact me any longer.”
 
 
 

Through what most people know as:
inductively-coupled-plasma-atomic-emission-spectroscopy,
are men able to accurately determine the weight and probable velocity of their ideas.
 
 
 

Where He Feels Comfortable, Insulated And In Command.
 A man’s home is his womb  --  “Did you say, tomb?”   Cute!
 
 

Regarding a previously mentioned item about, private, willful goofiness:
no matter a person’s natural born temperament, the man-who-knows
would treat even the most deadly of impending circumstances with the attitude:
“This is definitely a joke   --   just to see how I’ll react.”
 
 

After an illness, one man said he knew he was getting back to his normal self
when he began dropping things and bumping into stuff again.
"How, O how," brooded the Konfused Knave, "To determine the norm --
when thoust very being beest its sole arbitrator?"
 
 

Said a father to a son: “Taking your life seriously is nothing other than:
taking your own genetic temperament seriously.”
     “But how can you not?!”
“Admittedly it theoretically seems impossible  --   but then again there is that unspeakable difference between what we desire and what suits ordinary men   --