June
2, 2001.
“Pa pa, all of my life I have been trying to wake-up.
I could be dying;
please tell me all about it while there is still time.”
“You really want me to --
tell-you-all-about-it?"
“Yes.”
“Really and truly -- tell-you-all-about-it?”
“Please.”
“Tell you what I’m gonna do:
I’m going to -- tell-you-all-about-it.
Trying to wake up is like trying
to peel wet from water.
When I open the door to my room
to study myself --
there is no one there,
and when I am in there
-- no one opens the door.
It is a hammer that wants to
drive in a wobbly nail;
it is a wobbly nail that sometimes
thinks it’s a hammer.
A mate up in the crow’s nest;
eyes always glued to the horizon;
constantly trying to describe
his clothing to the people down below.
There is a box that believes
it owns the empty space it encloses,
and that the nothingness therein
is in its possession.
It is a foot which fruitlessly
scans the universe for a place to stand on;
operating in conjunction with
some ground
that pretends not to know it
is there.
It is finding the weather always
damp when you check with
your saliva drenched finger.
It is a dislike of the sound
you hear regularly played in your head,
and never failing to express
your dislike, every time you hear it.
It is struggling to strip the
cornea from the eyeball to clear up sight.
It is a moron who thinks of himself
as being an imbecile
in an attempt to raise his personal
bar by way of self censure.
It is dancing with yourself and
complaining of your partner’s feet.
It is asking outside fires to
extinguish your flames.
As soon as I step into the back
yard, the unruly, noisy dog immediately
becomes still and quiet…………………......….in
fact, he becomes invisible.
It is looking deeply into the
eyes of a reflection and saying:
“Do you come here often?” --
and later thinking:
“Who asked me that?”
It is looking frantically in
places where nothing is,
and periodically shouting: “I’ve
found it!!!…………Oh. Never mind.”
There is such a thing as being
awake,
but not such a thing as: trying to
wake up.
There is a reality of it, and an illusion of it:
the reality of it has no reality to
it,
only the illusion of it has an apparently reality to
it --
.....and this is what throws most people.
It is a shadow with just enough
sense to suspect that --
-- something-is-causing-something
--
but nothing beyond that.
It is chasing a rainbow with
a rainbow projector on your head.”
”Ah, come on paw, give it to me straight.”
“All right: it is you chasing
your brain with a brain tied to your brain.
It is you trying to nail
your brain down with your brain.
It is you attempting
to study your brain with your brain…”
”Hey
-- hold up! How’d this, ‘you’
suddenly get stuck into this
when it is surely the brain itself that is behind it all?”
“You’re right;
the brain slipped the, ‘you’
into the conversation
the same way it slips it into
its own consciousness, and gives birth to that ’self’ thing image in your
head that asked me to tell you about this
in the first place.
Lay back and savor it, my boy:
a voice crying out: ‘Help!
Come save me!’
and no one to respond but the
voice…….
which in the case of a few people
-- it does respond....well, it tries.
...until a few of the few
catch-on
to
what’s going-on.”
”Thanks, Dad.”
*
One
day while a mystical teacher was again explaining awakening
to
his followers, something quite extraordinary occurred:
he
stopped in mid sentence, and said: “Actually I have no idea what
being awake is, and in truth have no real interest in it.
I
started out wanting to be an entertainer,
but
just didn’t have a particular talent to make it.
Then
one day I read about how some people believe they are,’asleep,’
and
will do most anything to learn how to, ‘wake up,’
so
I starting talking about it as though I knew what I was doing;
it
was simply a way of finally becoming the center of attention with
SOME
group of people.
If
not real show biz – then this,”
and
upon hearing these words, several of those present suddenly --
woke
up.
(If this be too hot for you, you can replace the word, “mystic” with:
priest, rabbi, or know-it-all of any type.)
Testy
Corollary: Anyone who will tell you
what they specifically did that caused them to wake up,
is not awake.
Travel
Advisory, (in case you ever find yourself there):
In the land of boogie-gimp,
the more you deny that you’re a
boogie-gimper
the more boogie-gimped
you'll be.
When someone yells at you: “You’re
a boogie-gimp,”
and you holler back: “I no boogie-gimp”
–
you’ll just be making yourself
an even bigger boogie-gimper.
......(You can totally rely on
this; there are no exceptions.)
J
In one secret location, on cewis barrolls’ lirthday they define, “being
awake” as:
realizing that you don’t know what, “being asleep” means.
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