HIGH, AND PERHAPS TOO INSIDE.
                                 _____________
 
 
 

A son tugged on his father’s sleeve, and said:
”Tell me what spring training was like when 
you were a boy, and had to walk ten miles 
every day in the nice weather to get to the ball field.”
The old man pretended to look far away, nostalgically,
then finally responded:
”All children have dreams-in-the-muscles
of physical adventures they want to someday pursue;
a few turn out to harbor longings of a different sort.
Through their thoughts march a fragmented file of vague images that at first inspection seem unconnected to the honing of physical skills pertinent to survival.
The core of their childhood dreams rests in 
the intangible realm of thoughts, 
rather than in the palpable world of flesh and bone.
 

Even before they have any idea of what is going on, or have words to describe the enigmatic images that present themselves,
they nonetheless have a dream of someday playing in 
a certain big league -- 
but one in which the game is carried out entirely 
in a man’s head:
the game of: UNDERSTANDING-WHAT'S-GOING-ON.
 

This sparse, far-flung band of unrecognized, unorganized, special-little-leaguers
do not go to athletic coaches for instruction,
but to parents, priests, rabbis & philosophers,
who they quickly learn do not share their interest.
Their public speech leads the young to believe they do, 
but private conversations prove otherwise.
The adults even with the verbal appearance of interest in the matter tell the youngster that no one really understands what life is about,
and that all you can do is either: 
trust in allah/fate/astrology/some-swami’s-teaching,
or resign yourself to the mental enjoyment of 
the futile search therefore.

Once adolescent hormones have had their way,
few of the early dreamers are left with much of a metaphysical nature on their minds;
supporting oneself, parenthood,  escape from ennui, and other features of routine adulthood 
soon occupy all available space in a man’s mind.

The few of the original few whose special interest is not completely wrung from them by 
the twists and turns of physical maturation 
usually, (by accident), stumble across the attempted autobiography of an earlier would-be,
mental big leaguer,
which he takes to be a training manual.
It is also common for such people to discover other now, arm-chair athletes who have also become taken with the man and ideas in the discovered book,
and they form, or join an existing society devoted to 
their erstwhile, spiritual kinsman,
and here is where almost every childhood-dreamer-of understanding-what-is-going-on
spends the rest of his days in activities that are in 
any way pertinent to his initial interest.
The organizations they either start, or join, 
no matter how un mainstream, and exotic 
they may verbally seem, 
are still bastions of conservatism.
Though they generally condemn religion as having strayed from its original esoteric goal -- 
they share the same pew;
all groups gather together because of herd hormones;
no matter what they say is their purpose,
they get together to be together  --   physically --
and if they happen to have some non-physical 
interest in common --  so much the better,
(like free beer at a funeral).

There obviously is nothing “wrong” with socializing --
man is a socializing creature,
but mere indulgence in his pack instincts will never
lead to an understanding OF the instincts, 
or of the collective games played in the various,
international non tangible leagues,(aka the sundry, cultural worlds of arts & ideas).
 

You see son,
the very instinct that makes men want to be together
is also the primary source of the thoughts they have;
this accounts for the overall sameness of ideas 
prevalent in man;
while naturally occurring, cultural subsections within the whole herd may disagree over god’s correct name, they all concur regarding his existence,
and even those who deny the presence of the herd’s gods, by doing so are still reaffirming the importance of man’s mentally created, second reality. 
(Atheists serve the real cause of religion as much as do mullahs.)
 

Nothing that arises in the collective, gregarious instinct of man, that eventually finds its way into an 
individual’s thoughts 
ever carries any actual, practical batting or pitching tips;
all they ever tell you is how to behave in the stands, and get along with the rest of the crowd.
Thoughts originating there never give any 
actual information about the game itself;
yes, printed, and verbally conveyed programs are continually provided which purport to explain the game, 
but as witnessed by five thousand years of 
score keeping  --   they satisfy no one.
These holy and not so holy programs can certainly entertain, and give spectators something to argue over,
but to the few, still clutching their childhood dreams
of actually being in the game of
understanding-the-game --  they offer nothing.
 

Okay, son, if you are really interested, here is the
alternative ending to the common spring tale of
once-upon-a-time, mental big leaguers:
pay no attention to other men’s analysis of
what takes place on the field;
stop studying the programs, since those who write them understand no more about the game than you do.
All-in-all, simply don't get entangled in 
anything you hear said in the stands;
most of what people say, they don't mean seriously;
it's just them kiddin' around, 
wantin' to be friendly, and pass the time.
Ease up on your unfounded tenseness toward
other men's irrelevant tomfoolery  -- 
and above all:
learn to consistently slap yourself around in such a way
as to one day cause you to suddenly realize,
and remember forever that  -- 

          the game is entirely in your head.
 
 

The self discovery, and abiding awareness of this 
one simplicity is your one way ticket to the big leagues;
you will find it to be all of your sweet childhood dreams   --                                come true.”
 

                                         j
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

...as the boy got up to leave, he asked his father one more question: “In conversations such as these, why do you always make it a point to say that there are only a  ‘few’ who are interested in this matter, 
and refer to this interest as, ‘special’?” and the elder replied:
”Oh, it’s just one of the harmless little things that make children feel good.”